On tap --
everything that is currently on tap!
we hired a new social media guru; qwerty. we were told we were too far out there and such. i still don’t believe it, but when you’re not in charge, what are you to do? who knew qwerty would rule with such force? we’ve been hunted and pecked and i am about sick of. 10 more times and i am thru!
lager. 4% abv
i once got too close. you know what they say about flying too close to the sun. “hopefully you have sunglasses that won’t melt.”
saison w/ rye & wheat. 6% abv
i had a dream that madt compiled a secret beer name list. it was incomprehensible. i couldn’t read a single word, but boy did trevor love it. I have never heard him giggle that much, and that made it worthwhile.
hazy ipa. 6.66% abv
yum in the yum hole.
poem by josh
american lager. 5% abv
so this last description got people all sorts of befuddled and confrizzled. to be clear, honees will never not ever not go away. i hope that clears things up.
qwarty, the new h.r. (qwerty didn’t cut it)
peanut butter and honey golden ale w/ lactose. 5.6% abv
leche dorado de kittay
even though my bosses were angry because i did not do what they wanted me to do well enough, my fingers are forever crushed now and will not grow back. i am not gonna let it get me down. i plan to replace my hands with magnets, that way i can put other magnets on objects and i can still pick things up! that’s true ingenuity!
cream ale w/ lactose, vanilla, turmeric, ginger & cinnamon. 5% abv
a spice for you, and a spice for me, let us all see what this magic brings. a riddle did did, a rootie toot toot, oh dang, shoot, there’s a hole in me boot.
gruit-style ale w/ rainbow peppercorn, juniper berry, clove, and coriander. 6% abv
party on garth
it is a new year. it is time for a rip of that, a chunk of this, and perhaps more…
black ale. 6% abv
read this carefully, and remember. flex is a lady and the harder she flexes, the stronger her muscles become. very neat indeed. if you see her around, tell her what a great job she is doing, and also to watch out for that tyrant vin weasel and his henchman, tiny buffman.
bock lager. 6% abv
dr. richard punch
now a playable character in super smash bros. ultimate! to unlock dr. richard punch, jam on b, a, b, a, x+y, y+x, +,+,+,-,-,-,right, left, right+left, left-right, go around the world with the right stick, first counterclockwise, then counterclockwise again, but halfway through, change direction and finish clockwise, then press every button at once and throw your controller onto the ground and jump on it. then buy a new controller and viola! dr. richard punch is ready to fight.
milk stout. 5.8% abv
it has returned. the sequel to last year’s just horseplay. same beer, different bourbon, tasty trongis trongs and feelings lurkin! if ye be wanting this here fanciful scrawling, look no further and crawl upside down thru your mind’s eye tunnel and snatch a crowler or tulip from those low-hanging synapses. be quiet and smooth, and i will tell no one of the wonder thou dost hath embarked upon. cheereth!
bourbon barrel aged russian imperial stout. 10% abv
torn thusly from the trouser hem of ding dongs pants. this is a nice lager. it’s rich, rich, rich, cherry baby! but like a not so sweet cake rich; more plural than singular. to those about to bock, we salute brew.
doppelbock lager. 8% abv
to go --
everything that is available to go! (though not listed, everyTHIng on tap is available to go, too!)
12oz 4 packs
hunkboy robust porter. 6% abv
lizardize mariguanas hazy ipa. 6.66% abv